Hot Boudin, Cold Cous-Cous...

I'll Hold Off on that NFL Apathy for Just One Column:

Watching the Bears/Seahawks game last night made me realize something, and it had nothing to do with Ricky Manning Jr. not beating people up for using a laptop at Denny’s.

I’d have him pegged for a Lumberjack Slam.

What I saw clear for the first time is that, in my sports world, there are the teams that I am passionate about no matter the circumstances, and there are other teams I pull for on a much more fleeting level. Those top-tier teams (for me LSU and the Saints, nothing else really comes close) could have the worst coaching staff in the world, the most inane management, the least likable athletes, etc., and my fandom would not be affected in any way. Those teams second-tier and below, well, for me, they depend solely on current management, coaching, and athletes—take those away, and I probably won’t feel the same connection I felt before.

Now, I’m not going to say I’m a Bears fan in the least, because that would imply some sort of lifelong investment. Did I give a shit about the Bears when Dick Jauron was coaching, or when Erik Kramer was their field general?

I found this website through Google Images: www.mrtvseverything.com/TPack.html. I’ve reached the end of the internet.

Absolutely not. But I would be remiss saying that I wasn’t excited about the places this Lovie-Smith-coached, Grossman-led Bears team could go this year. They play the type of football I’ve always been in love with: a physical defense that feeds off crowd noise, sound tackling, and respect, and an offense that knows its strengths, utilizes play action practically, and involves Rex Grossman. Also, there’s a likeable set of fans in Chicago that’s about due for another Super Bowl appearance. And classic jerseys. Let’s just say, if the Saints aren’t stepping onto Solider Field in January, I’m pulling for the Bears.

Rex, heard you did a lot of coke at UF

But there’s a fundamental difference between pulling for the Bears in nearly every situation this year, or any year under Lovie Smith for that matter, and pledging allegiance as a Bear fan. Am I going to make special trips to bars this fall for the specific intent of watching Bernard Berrian continue his fifteen minutes? Am I going to Gamecast Chicago games in the engineering building? No. I’ll admit that four years ago I didn’t give a shit about Chicago. Call me a fair-weather fan, but the Bears have been relevant for the past two years now, and it’s caught my attention. The Browns, for example, (always liked them) may well be playing similar ball right now, but the fact that they’re going to finish 4-12 eliminates them from receiving much of my attention as a football fan. Also, I don’t think I’ve ever seen a picture of Charlie Frye’s face… it’s hard to align yourself with a team currently so irrelevant.

It’s easy to align yourself with Charlie’s Fryes. I love Google.

So I guess I’ll wrap up with this: in my life, I’ll always have LSU, the Saints, and types of football. There are certain teams that, even with the most hard-nosed, physical defense ever, will not be considered a preference of mine (Falcons, Colts, and Rams, I’m looking right at you). But for the most part, if you fit the formula of a football team I’d create on Playstation, I probably would like to see you in the playoffs, and might even pace a dated jersey of yours from eBay one afternoon. Watching the game last night made me realize how at ease and guiltless I can be for favoring this year’s Bears just as much as I would have favored the ’67 Packers, or the ’85 Bears, which probably would have been my favorite team ever. Just preferred attitude, strategy, and method of execution is enough for me to root for pretty much anyone, in anything. Unless you’re playing the Saints, of course.

While on the NFL, here’s how I’d extrapolate the rest of the season using four weeks:

AFC Playoff Berths

1. Indianapolis
2. Cincinnati
3. New England
4. Denver
5. Jacksonville
6. Baltimore

NFC Playoff Berths

1. Chicago
2. Seattle
3. Carolina
4. Dallas
5. Philadelphia
6. New Orleans

Are we making the playoffs? Probably not, but a hard coach is enough to earn a six-spot from me. Also, the city needs it and all, since apparently football success is the only motivator to rebuild. Katrina.

- P.T.