Hot Boudin, Cold Cous-Cous...

So Who Exactly Is Healthy for Tennessee?: Week 9 Dose of Pessimism:

This week has seen its share of Phil Fulmer playing his best Belichick-esque role of coaching mastermind, nonchalantly mentioning nagging injuries which may keep some of his skill players sidelined. The highlights:

"Obviously Jonathan ... against the No. 1 defense in the country, that's not exactly how you want to start your career. He'll certainly get some time. Erik being a little bit on the gimpy side, although I believe he'll be fine to play, that's not exactly the kind of defense you want to go against."

"Erik did everything today, practically everything. That's a real plus. That's much improved from yesterday. Still don't have any solid say on exactly what we're going to do, but I'd say it looks like he's going to be able to play."

Not that difficult to find a good Philip image.

Aww, and we were just preparing for Crompton all week. I hate Philip Fulmer, and I'd put him on Tuberville's level if we were in the East. Yeah, despite all the injuries, Fulmer pretty much credits himself and his culture at Tennessee for instilling enough desire in the players to play through pain:

"I think it comes from the head football coach and from the coordinators and I think it comes from the upperclassmen leading the way as to how it's supposed to be. That's the way it's been since I've been here. It's what expected about how they go about their business. I'm not trying to ring my bell, but that's just the way I think."

Tennessee's really different from other major college football programs, you know, and their athletes are really tough and stuff. Heck, even Christopher Leak played through a concussion last weekend.

Google. Image.

Speaking of Ainge, I better not jump the gun or anything, but we embarrassed this guy last season, and it's not like Tennessee's offensive line has completely restocked itself. Before YouTube sold out, I watched the video of Ainge hastily throwing the ball away-- into the hands of Butkus Award Finalist Ali Highsmith-- to avoid a safety about 1900 times in the past six months.

2006 entries into the Erik Ainge Hall of Fame include Omarr Conner, Lester Ricard, and Andre Woodson.

Ainge is a completely different quarterback though, as the media keeps telling us, and he's also not playing in a crazed, post-Katrina tank of humidity. Tennessee's comeback from a 5-6 season last year was about as predictable as Fulmer upgrading to a 48 waist; just how legitimate this comeback is will be seen in the next two weeks. The Vols, apparently limited at QB and RB with nagging ankle injuries, have to turn around and play in Fayetteville, an underrated, then overrated, then underrated homefield advantage. Let the record show that Tennessee has beaten a much-improved California team who withered from the heat about two hours after the plane landed, a hapless Georgia team going through countless transitions, and Mike Shula on the road. The last two were close, even.



Still, I'm not optimistic; we might get out to an early lead, make enough mistakes to let Tennessee hang around, and give it away in the fourth. I don't know. We might get blown out, even, a statement game that finally makes me admit the Les Miles Era is not going to end well. I'm jaded after two losses-- one in which we played near-perfect save for one drive and a couple mental breakdowns, and one in which we played the worst game since Georgia '04. I writhed in anguish during the Auburn controversy; I threw stuff at Chevis Jackson's image on the TV then proceeded to move on-- as a fan, as a person-- before JaMaicus's second interception. The losses just don't sting as much when they keep happening.

This isn't a funeral, though. We can only hope to get 2007 contributors like Keiland Williams, Trindon Holliday, Brandon LaFell, Ricky Jean-Francois, and Dick Dickson some meaningful playing time in a 'hostile' environment. Neyland Stadium should theoretically be the loudest stadium ever, and Death Valley and the Swamp are mentioned about 15 times more.

A collection of 108,000 fans who sit on their hands when things aren't going well.

As much as I hated reading the articles about Les Miles being under fire, this really is a must-win game for his well-being in Baton Rouge, unless he wants some free luggage dumped on his lawn early Sunday morning. Fans, understandably, want a signature moment from 2006, an image to set as desktop wallpaper or story to tell ten years from now that didn't involve biased officiating. And those possibilities are becoming fewer in number as the season progresses. We couldn't win in Auburn, and couldn't 'settle' with a win in Gainesville. Of course, I'll 'settle' for a win in Knoxville, but if I'm settling for a rousing 31-21 victory over Iowa State in the Independence Bowl, something's wrong.

You'll always be the Poulan Weedeater Independence Bowl to me. Whatever, it'll be an excuse to spend a paced night with Fifty.

Jimbo Fisher plus a week off plus some additional freedom in offensive playcalls should translate into more creative schemes, such as Early Doucet lining up at quarterback. And it helps that Tennessee's front seven is probably the worst it's been in a long time (people forget they had linemen drafted after ast season), so running the ball up the middle might actually get four yards a couple of times. JaMaicus didn't have a particularly good game against Fresno State, so even the JR Theory aligns well. Don't blame me if I edit this paragraph on Sunday morning.

The prediction: Tennessee 20 LSU 17.

By the way, I'm not keeping a tally or anything, but I'm something like 1-8 with predictions this season. I halfway expected a 'Neer to ignite my couch in the middle of the night seeking revenge. It's not my fault that West Virginia put the ball on the ground about nineteen times and played their worst game in three years. Louisville in the title game? Luckily, FOX has assembled a broadcast team that can get anyone "fired up."

- P.T.