That one kind of escalated in the first half, huh? If not for a timely Chase Pittman strip-and-fumble to end the half (where you been all year, Chase?), we could have sent 'Bama fans away with the usual giddy eighty-mile drive to New Orleans to party. Instead, they probably took I-12 home instead. Some thoughts:
- Like clockwork, captains JaMarcus, LaRon, Ceej Jackson, and Ryan Willis failed to win the coin toss, less than six days after I devoted an entire column to the most interesting story of the season. Sometimes college football is so predictable. So the offense took the field before the defense for the first time in 2006.
- Can we just take a minute and devote a few more words to perhaps the most talented quarterback in LSU history? One part invincible, one part collected, three parts efficient, fifty parts I can throw the football out of the fucking stadium. Last night I talked to my dad with the usual phone call after a decent win. He mentioned that he actually doesn't want JaMarcus to leave (oh, really?) but keeps hearing rumors that 'Maicus is a solid first-round pick and is leaning more and more towards packing up. I haven't been in this much denial since the first few days after Katrina. No, no, I haven't heard any of those rumors. I hope the average fan is beginning to realize that life after JaMarcus in 2007 or 2008-- with an even more high-profile, unbreakable, cancerously cocky replacement, no less-- is going to be downright miserable.
Long. White. Socks. With the addition of the Nike swoosh, it's pretty 1995.
- I forgot how nightmarish those first few chords of "Hey, Alabama!" are. My God, they're relentless with it. Years like '96 and '02, my ears were ringing with Dummm Dummm Dum-Dummm... Dum Dum Dum Dum Dum Dum Dum Dummm Dummm Dum-Dumm.... for about three weeks after the fact.
- Thanks to Georgia for getting my hopes sky high yesterday; thanks to Tennessee for downright shitting the bed. See, a Georgia win over Auburn coupled with a potential Tennessee win over Arkansas meant that LSU would control its own destiny in making the conference championship. Now, I'm facing the fact that I should take Houston Nutt seriously, that Darren McFadden is probably the best football player in the nation, and that our Atlanta hopes come down to Mississippi State and Alabama. But, hey, at least Auburn lost about ten million on Saturday.
Hey Cox, can't wait to play you next October, when Kenny's not in your backfield! - HTF.- I was watching last night's game with the Florida fans who were actually pretty relieved Arkansas paced the Vols. We'd love to get another shot at Florida on a neutral field. Love to. Also, given the fact that Florida is probably the equivalent of Florida by Ron Zook: 2004 right now, I really wanted another shot at them. Oh well, Arkansas fans will be pretty easy to make fun of on New Year's night downtown.
You look hard enough, you'll find an Arkansas-related frosted cereal image. Pig sooey?- Chevis Jackson. Where was I? I wouldn't trust this man with delivering my chinese food. Seriously, hope for the receiver to drop the pass and then celebrate, and maybe every now and then interfere just for good measure. I'm looking at you too, Zenon, who has strung together some of his worst games ever these past few weeks. John Parker Wilson to Jimmy Johns? Let's hope we're not playing Texas Tech in the Cotton Bowl.
Chev-Chev does his best to muff something else.- The funniest moment of the night was listening to Mike Patrick mention that Alley Broussard has dropped down to 238. Uh, I don't think so. I'm pretty sure the dude's gained weight since the opener; we even had a closeup of his neck roll while he was sitting on the bench. ESPN Full Circle would've been great last night.
Hey, Alley, you're so fat that the announcers are calling you the fullback and Hester the running back. Just thought you should know.- Alabama, as expected, threw everything at us last night: onside kicks, fake punts, reverse passes, etc. Season's really in desperation mode; a win against Auburn might be the only saving grace for Our Boy #11. Speaking of Mike, I think he goes right up there with Jim Haslett, Art Shell, Jim Mora Jr., Jim Fassel, and Urban Meyer for having the worst possible sideline face when things are going wrong. I'm pretty sure he's my favorite.
- Maybe we have a running game now! Maybe Keiland, Jake, and Alley provide just enough changes of pace to get the job done. Maybe our offensive line has finally learned how to create holes. Now, now, let's not get too arrogant and pace all 150 lbs. of Trindon Holliday in the backfield-- he'd turn to dust. Speaking of Trin, they said he ran a 4.27 40 from an upright stance. We're going to win the title next season.
- Two of my favorite LaRon moments back-to-back last night. First, he welcomes John Parker Wilson to the Alabama job by giving him the Brodie Croyle Treatment, then he breaks up maybe the most ill-conceived fake punt possible by flinging the punter around by the facemask. Pelini, who was standing right there, had a great reaction, in the grey sweatshirt no less. One of the worst facemasks I've ever seen. Five yards. Offsetting penalties. Repeat the down. Game over.
Two weeks in a row of wanting to make fun of the opposing quarterback, two huge disappointments.- We've now won the last four and six of the last seven against 'Bama. Mike Shula is 0-5-1 against the Tigers. We're getting some of their best athletes. I might actually bury a copy of this blog and dig it up twenty years from now just to have a good laugh.
So what now? Is there anything to be halfway optimistic about? No team in the nation has played a tougher schedule than LSU-- the Arkansas game will mark the fourth road game against a top-eight team. Going 2-2 in those games is in no way disappointing, and we're the highest-rated two-loss team in the country. A few more one-loss teams losing could mean an at-large berth for the Tigers, possibly pacing the ACC winner in the Orange Bowl.
Ga Tech, Wake, or Maryland? Book me a ticket.
But hey, I'm the same wide-eyed fan who had visions of LSU in the Rose Bowl the week before the Florida game. Go ahead, dream it, you fuckin' dreamers.
- P.T.
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